I.

If you say to me one more time,

“I know you don’t like movies, but…”

I’ll forget to pay the gas bill.

And maybe the house will get so cold

That you’ll take the trash out with you.

II.

People who’ve stayed

at Ward Churchill’s house

Say that his cabinets are stocked only with Hormel Chili and Spaghetti-O’s.

Which is fine

In his specific case.

III.

We’re going out dancing

And we’re not inviting you.

Mostly because of that thing you said about my haircut.

But also because we like boys

And also because you live a joyless existence.